Survival
by omalleyanatomy26
Summary: A Teenchester fic. John is sexually abusing Sam. Sam is too scared to tell Dean. On top of that Sam has asthma and that does't help his breathing. What happens when Dean finds out what John is doing to Sam? PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW! UPDATED!
1. Chapter 1

**Must...resist....new....story...**

**Yes, John is going to be out of character in this. I know that the John on the show would NEVER do this...but still, makes for a good story; as twisted at that sounds, lol.

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****Prologue

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**Sam woke, gasping for breath. He closed his eyes, trying to shut out the nightmares. They wouldn't leave him alone though. They loved to poke at him, to torment him.

The walls of the room was thin. He heard his father drinking in the other room. When he stayed, and not on a hunt, he always got two rooms. When they were younger they just got two beds and shared; but John soon realized they were too old to be sharing beds anymore. Besides, a seperate bedroom made things a whole lot easier for his father.

He stiffened as he thought about those moments. Those moments where Dean was out breathing in some fresh air and John asking Sam to come into the other room. How John would lock the door and close the shades and how Sam just stood there, knowing what was going to happen.

Bile was in his throat as he remembered the first time it happened. John forced him over the bed, ordered him to strip. Ordered him to do what he was told, to not ask questions.

Sam begged for him to stop, he was only 12 when it first happened. But the age didn't seem to matter to John. John ordered him not to cry out, not to make noise. Painfully Sam obeyed. He hurt like hell for the next week but bore it silently even though it was obvious to Dean that something was wrong.

But Sam was terrified of telling his brother. Terrified of experiencing the wrath of John Winchester and of Dean being utterly disgusted with him.

Dean was out with friends that night. They were only staying for a couple of weeks, but Dean was always quick on making friends.

Sam had locked the door on purpose, but he still laid on the bed, petrified. Dean wasn't there to protect him, he knew his father was going to take advatange of it. He hated himself for being so weak and defenless. He was 16, damn it. He should be able to fight himself against John! He wasn't a child anymore...and yet; he couldn't.

"Sam?" John's gruff voice appeared from behind the door. "Sam, open the door!"

"Leave me alone, dad." Sam pleaded. "Please...not tonight. Just please..."

"Don't make me pick the lock," John growled. "Open the Goddamned door, Sam."

"Please, Dad...no, just leave me alone-please." Sam was begging now. Tears were rolling down his face. "Just for one night, please..."

"Damn it, Sam, open the fucking door!" John's voice was really angry now, he wasn't used to being disobeyed. "You don't get to lock me out, Samuel."

"Please dad..." Terrified Sam hugged himself, tears falling faster now. "Please." He heard the lock being picked and bit his lip, terrified of the wrath that he was about to experience.

"Dad...please, no..."

The door was pushed open. John stood in the doorway, his eyes flashing with anger. He walked over to the bed. Sam got up.

"I'm sorry," he managed to gasp. "I'm sorry."

"No, you're not," John growled harshly. "Not yet, but you well be." He went back to close and lock the door. Sam swallowed, he was trapped. Roughly John hit him on the side of his chest and threw him over the bed. They both knew John couldn't hit him in the face, than Dean would see the bruises.

"Strip," he ordered. Too terrified to disobeye Sam did what he was told and he winced as John roughly entered him. It was going to be harder than any other times that they had done it, even the first time. He buried his head into the pillow-too afraid to make a single sound. To let a single sob escape. He could only pray for John to be over quickly.

When John was finished he lowered Sam's head, forcing his penis into his son's mouth. Sam took it, unable to do anything else, silent tears spilled from his eyes.

Finally when John was finished he grabbed the belt from his jeans.

"Please, no..." Sam started to beg but realized it was pointless. He cried out as the belt struck his back, over and over again. John was silent and sullen when he did this, completly ignoring Sam's cries for help and his muffled apologizies.

He grabbed Sam's hair and pulled him up and whispered harshly into his ear.

"Next time you lock the door on me you'll wish you've never been born. Got that boy?"

Sam quickly nodded, gasping for breath. When John stormed out he laid there, trembling and went to grab his inhaler. He had asthma for a number of years and these incidences always made it difficult for him to breathe.

He slowly dressed himself and laid on he bed and quietly sobbed himself to sleep wishing desperatly that Dean was there, to protect him and to save him from the monster that they both lived with...

**TBC **


	2. Chapter 2

**Wow, thanks for all the reviews! Just for that you get an _extra _update.

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Dean opened the door and walked in close around midnight. He groaned as he ran into the nearby table. He was only half drunk, though. He turned on the light and smiled as he saw his brother sound asleep in the bed. Sammy was never really a night owl. As quietly as he could, he undressed. He listened as he heard his father snoring in the other room.

He saw that there weren't any blankets on Sam. Quickly he reached over to pull one over his brother's body. As he did so Sam's shirt moved and he stared at the welts across his brother's back. Sam moaned softly in his sleep.

"Sam." His voice shook when he spoke. "Sammy." Sam flickered his eyes open. His always tense muscles relaxed as he heard Dean speaking to him. Dean had come back to him. Things were always better when Dean was around.

"Dean?" He rolled over and looked surprised at the anger flashing in Dean's eyes? _Oh God...Did he know?_

"Where did those welts come from?" Dean's voice was cold. Sam stiffened as he rose.

"I...don't know."

"Don't lie to me Sam!"

Sam shook when his brother yelled at him.

"I....it was some kid." His shoulder's slumped.

"You could have fought him off, Sammy." Dean's voice was filled with accusation and question.

"It was a group of them."

Dean's face paled dangerously.

"Do you remember who they were?"

"No," Sam whispered. "It was dark." His throat closed. "Please...please don't tell dad."

Dean didn't agree to that right away.

"Did they hurt you anywhere else? Do anything else to you?" His voice was dark, dangerous, un Dean like."

"No," Sam said, lying through his teeth.

Dean swallowed, trying to control his temper.

"Tell me right away if you remember what they look like," he said quietly. "I swear to God when I find out who they are I'm gonna-"

"Dean, don't," Sam begged suddenly, just don't."

Dean slowly nodded, tears were in his eyes as he saw the pain on his young brother's face.

He went to the bathroom.

"What are you doing?" Sam asked, fear in his voice.

"Getting a cloth." Dean's voice was strained.

"Please, don't tell dad," Sam suddenly reminded him and Dean sighed.

"All right, for now I won't. But if it happens again I don't see that I have a choice, Sammy."

Sam nodded, trying to hold back his tears and keep his body from shaking. Dean leaned over him.

"Roll over," he said softly and Sam stiffened at first. _This is Dean asking you, not dad. Dean wouldn't do anything _

But still, he stiffened as Dean touched the welts.

"It's okay, Sammy." Dean's voice was soft and trying not to break. He was shaking in silent anger as he dabbed the wet cloth onto his brother's body. When he found those sonofbitches...he bit his lip and forced himself to remaine calm.

Sam closed his eyes and slowly allowed himself to relax as he felt the cold water trickle down his back. He sighed and soon fell asleep due to exhaustion. Dean smiled softly and continued to care for his brother's wounds throughout the night...

**Sorry it's short but it's two updates in a day, so there. :)**


	3. Chapter 3

**A special update since it's Easter-though it's not a very happy fic lol

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Dean watched his brother sink into a deep sleep. Slowly he fingered the welts, anger boiling inside of him.

Slowly he pulled Sam's shirt back down and crawled into bed. He shook his head.

As soon as he found those assholes...with those thoughts inside of him he managed to fall asleep.

The door knocked, startling both of them. Sam stifffened at the knocking, memories of last night replaying in his head. Dean quickly opened the door and John walked in briskly.

"Found a hunt nearby," John said. "A poltergiest"

"Great, I just love those things." Dean rolled his eyes and John looked at him suddenly.

"I think you should do this one alone, Dean," he said suddenly and Dean frowned.

"What?"

"It's about time you went on a hunting trip alone. Sam has to go to school anyway." His eyes travelled to his youngest son who was sitting up. "It'll be good practice," he added.

"You're...you're letting me go on a hunt by myself?"

John nodded with a smile.

"You've earned it son."

Dean turned to Sam with a grin but his grin faultered when he saw how pale Sam looked,

"Sammy, you okay?"

Sam swallowed and glanced briefly at his father who gave him a warning look with his eyes.

"Yeah, 'm fine. That's great though, really great."

Dean's smile returned.

"As soon as you get out of that jail that's school we'll be able to go on more hunts together," he promised. Sam continued to smile.

"That's great," he found himself repeating. "I'd like that."

The grin still remained on Dean's face, completly oblvious to the real reason John wanted him out of the way. More access to Sam. But worry found him. Should he really be leavnig Sam alone when these kids were giving him such a hard time?

"Well what are you waiting of?" John told Sam suddenly. "Don't want to be late for school, do you?"

Sam quickly shook his head.

"No sir." His voice was flat.

John nodded.

"Bobby's letting you borrow one of his cars," he added to Dean. "It's waiting for you in the parking lot."

Dean grinned, pride filling him. Pride that his father was finally letting him go on a hunt by himself.

"Thanks Dad, really you don't know what this means to me," he said sincerly.

"You've earned it." John's voice was gruff when he spoke and left. Dean looked at Sam who's face suddenly appeared crestfallen. How was he going to survive those days without Dean?

"Hey buddy, you seriously okay with me going by myself?" Worry was in Dean's voice now.

"Yeah," Sam quickly lied and Dean snorted.

"You always were such a lousy liar." He sat next to Sam. "Those kids, are you worried about them giving you trouble?"

Slowly Sam nodded.

Dean sighed.

"Maybe you could ask dad to show you a few more moves, or something. I would, but there's no time." He bit his lip. "Maybe I should tell dad..."

"Don't!" Sam pratically shouted. "Sorry." He saw the surprise in Dean's eyes. "It's nothing, I'll be able to handle it. I promise."

Dean frowned.

"You sure?"

"Yeah, I'm sure."

"All right." Dean sighed. "I still think you should tell dad-" He saw the fear in Sam's eyes. "But I know you won't. Just here, take this as a precaution." He handed Sam his knife. "You're gonna need it more right now than I will," he added. Sam slowly took it, fingering the handle. John had given it to Dean on his 13th birthday.

"Thanks," he whispered.

Dean nodded.

"Just don't _lose _it," he warned his little brother who attempted to smile back.

"I won't," Sam promised.

"And only use it when you really need to," he added. Sam nodded, wondering if he could ever use it on John. Would he have the heart, the stomach to stab his own father?

But he was glad to know it was there. That he could keep it under his pillow.

"I'll remember that," he promised and Dean grinned while ruffling his hair.

"Get dressed squirt," he teased, using Sam's old nickname. Sam's face flushed.

"I'm not a squirt anymore," he muttered as he stood up.

"To me you'll always be one," Dean said, playfully batting his eyeslashes. Sam punched him on the shoulder as he grabbed his jeanes. Finally Dean was getting him to really smile but now he was begining to feel sick. Dean would be gone for a while, a few days at least, who knows how often John would want to rape Sam.

But this was Dean's first hunting trip alone. He had to swallow his fears.

"Take it like a man!" As his father would yell at him.

He'd be brave, Dean would want him to be brave. Mary would want him to be brave.

Quickly he dressed, anxious to be in school. Away from that monster.

Dean let him hug him before taking off in the car Bobby lent him.

"Take care kiddo, don't do anything I wouldn't do," Dean added with a mischevious wink. Sam smiled and waved as Dean drove off. He flinched as he saw his father looking at him.

"Aren't we going to the school?" Sam asked desperatly. He had to escape during the day, _he just had to._

"I think you could use a day off, don't you?" John asked smoothly.

"Dad, please, I just want to go to school."

"I always thought you were a weird kid, most kids would be thrilled with a day off."

"Please dad, not now. Can't it wait?" John grabbed him by the collar.

"Get inside," he hissed. Trying not to start sobbing Sam quickly obeyed and John locked the door.

"I'm still hurting," Sam protested. "From last night."

"You're own damned fault," John growled. "You shouldn't have locked the damn door. You deserve it."

"Please, daddy..." Sam tried a desperate trick, calling him daddy instead of dad. Trying to get John to remember that he was still a kid. But John didn't even flinch.

"Strip," he ordered. Sam didn't move. "Don't make me strip for you!" He boomed, his voice threatening.

Sobbing Sam obeyed.

"And stop crying!" John hit him across the face, startling him. "Take it like a Goddamned man! I didn't raise you to be weak!"

"Yes sir," Sam whispered, praying that Dean had forgotten something. That he'd come back for him.

"Now bed over." John's voice was a dark growl now. Sam quickly obeyed and bit his lip to keep from crying out as John entered him. He grabbed the blankets in front of him and waited for it to be over. Waited for Dean to come in and save him.

But Dean wasn't going to come. He knew that for a fact.

This time he was all alone, with no one to help him, or to even care...

**TBC**


	4. Chapter 4

**Just because I'm feeling kind right now :)

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Sam choked as the penis was forced into his mouth. He couldn't help it, he gagged and vomitted suddenly. John hit him roughly over the head.

"You fucking bitch," he growled. "Just look at the mess you made!"

Sam convulsed into shuddering sobs.

"I'm sorry," he mumbled and his father sighed.

"Clean it up," he snarled and Sam quickly went to obey. When he had finished he stood up and he gasped when he felt his father slide on a cock ring.

"You wear that until I take it off," he growled. "That's to keep you from jerking off when you're alone, to remind you that you belong to _me_, got that?"

Sam shuddered, and bit his lip.

"Please...dad, don't.."

John struck him across the face, not caring about the bruises.

"It's more for punishment though," he added. "For making this goddamned mess, for complaining all the time." He glared at Sam who stood there, convulsed in sobs. "You really are pathetic," he sneered. He grabbed his coat. "I'm going out for some air," he added ."That cock ring better still be on when I get back, or there'd be hell to pay"

Sam continued to shudder and sob but managed to nod.

"Yes sir," he mumbled.

"And wipe your goddamned nose, you look like a mess."

"Yes sir," Sam whispered and hastenly obeyed. John stormed out. Sam stood there, his entire body shaking. He hated feeling so helpless and now even his penis felt trapped, thanks to John.

He felt sick to his stomach, he could barely stand it, he felt vomit rising. _No, he would not throw up again! _He forced the bile back down. He looked at the cock ring, wanting despeatly to take it off. He could always put it back on before John came home but he was too terrified of disobeying his father now. He laid on his bed and stared at the one next to it, how empty the room felt without Dean. It's not even been a full day, not even a few hours, and he already felt utterly alone. He fingered the knife that he had stuffed under the pillow. Could he really do it? Stab his father? Terrified at what Dean would do or think if he came back home to find out that Sam killed John he shoved the knife back under the pillow and cried bitterly as the pain worsened. He realized that John could leave the cock ring on for days and there was nothing he could do about it. He was John's prisoner, his slave and that was exactly what John wanted him to think.

There was no escaping it now, he was forever trapped.

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Dean drove silently down the road. He was filled with pride that his father finally trusted him on a hunt. But the look of Sam's crestfallen face kept haunting him. Why did Sam look so sad that he was leaving? Was it really because of those kids? Dean's knuckles tightened at the thought of them, but even that story seemed fishy. And why was John suddenly so eager for Dean to leave? Non of it made any sense.

He shook his head.

"You're just being parnoid about leaving Sam and nervous about your first hunt by yourself, Dean," he said firmly and nodded, trying to convince himself. "Everything's fine, stop worrying."

So how come he couldn't shake that dreadful feeling that something was wrong, _really _wrong?

**TBC**

**Sorry for the short chapter, but that's TWO updates in one day, again! lol.**


	5. Chapter 5

**I don't know why, but I'm just really eager to update this fic :)**

**Warning, this chapter is gonna be kind of dark. **

That night was hell for him. There was no Dean for John to worry about, which is why he wanted Dean gone in the first place. He raped Sam while forcing Sam to still wear the cock ring. When Sam cried out in pain John slapped him hard on the face and than grabbed the belt to wip him across the back. He only stopped when Sam started to struggle to breathe, his asthma getting the best of him.

"Here." John tossed him his inhaler. He shook his head. "You really are pathetic, aren't you?" Sam said nothing as he used to inhaler to calm his breathing. For once he was glad for a near asthma attack, it stopped John from raping him. Finally John took off the cock ring before bed and Sam shuddered in relief. Despite his fear he fell asleep at once, utterly exhausted.

But when he woke he saw his father leaning over him, slipping the cock ring onto his already bruised penis.

"You wear that," he growled warningly. "During school. You can't escape me, even when you're there-you got that?"

Sam nodded silently, too terrified to protest.

"You're gonna wear that every day," John decided. "Until I take it off at night. I've decided that this will show you're appreciation more, remind you who you are. Who you belong to. And have you stop complaining all the damned time and act a little bit grateful for when I take it off."

Sam shuddered at the idea, but slowly nodded. He wanted to get through this morning without a single beating.

"I can't have you miss too much school," John added. "They'll ask questions, they always do." He was talking to himself now. "And you better not take it off doing the day." His voice was dark and dangerous. "I'll know if you will, you got that? I'll know. Remember that."

"Yessir." The pain was already resurfacing but Sam refused to show his father any of the pain that he was feeling.

"When Dean returns you best hide that ring," John told him. "You're gonna be wearing that fairly often now, and you don't want him knowing about it."

"Yessir." Sam sounded helpless now, he wasn't sure what to do anymore. He was John's slave, he belonged to his father and his father knew that. He couldn't escape John, not even in school, and that was exactly what John wanted him to feel. Trapped at all times. A constant reminder of his control over Sam. The thought of Dean finding out about all this terrified Sam. What would Dean think of him?

"Now get ready for school," John ordered. Sam quickly did just that, too afraid of making his father angry somehow. His penis was already in pain, he wasn't sure if he could endure a whole other day of this without vomiting in the classroom. How the hell was he going to be able to concentrate on schoolwork? Not that John cared about school, he only made Sam and Dean go to keep the authorities off of his back.

John drove Sam to school and glared at his son before dropping him off.

"And remember," he said warningly. "The cock ring stays on, all day, got that?"

Sam nodded.

"Yessir."

"Good. I'll see you exactly 3:30." John's voice was firm and decisive. No room for questioning or error. Sam nodded. He could barely walk to his locker, he was aching so bady. His stomach couldn't stop churning. He managed to slide into his seat before the bell rang.

He already had to force vomit back down his throat. He groaned as his teacher reminded them that today was test day. How could he have forgotten? Oh, because he was too busy being raped by his father, that's how. How the hell was he going to be able to conentrate? His penis hurt like hell. But he was too terrified to remove it, the thought crossed his mind. How would John know? But if John did guess he had removed it...Sam shuddered, what if he couldn't slide it back on again himself? No, too dangerous.

He bit his lip and forced himself to concentrate on the test, hoping that he passed. He tried not to squirm, tried not to get noticed, but tears were in his eyes. He kept on using the inhaler during the day, he was having more and more trouble breathing.

Finally school was let out. He could only hope that his father would show some mercy. He hurried to the parking lot, the Impala was there. He climbed in and John stared at him.

"Good day at school?" His voice was gruff and silently Sam nodded. Finally they arrived back into the motel. John didn't hesitate to order him to strip. Sam quickly obeyed and John studied the cock ring and his penis was was clearly bruised and a bit swollen.

"You removed it, didn't you?" His voice was a snarl. "You little piece of shit."

Sam's eyes widened.

"What? No, dad, I swear, I kept it on like you said-" He was inturrupted by a smack across the face.

"Don't lie to me!" John growled. "You removed it, after I told you not to! I know you did." He reached for his belt.

"No, dad, I swear, I didn't!" Sam was sobbing now, terrified of his father's wrath. "Please!"

"Begging won't save you now, Samuel," John snapped as he struck him across the chest and than across the back. The beating continued and Sam's breathing got harder and harder. He couldn't reach his inhaler, though! It was in his clothes. He laid on the floor as the belt continued to strike at him, praying for someone to save him. Praying for Dean to return and for this nightmare to end.

**Like it, hate it? Remember REVIEW! I live for them now!**

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	6. Chapter 6

**Thanks for the reviews!

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Sam was really struggling to breathe, his eyes widened with panic as John rolled him over and straddled him.

"Dad, please!"

"Winchester's don't beg," John growled dangerously.

"P...please...d...dad, can't... breathe!" Sam desperatly called out.

John stopped than.

"What?"

"My...inhaler," Sam rasped. "Need it..."

John got off him him and went to his clothes and fished out the inhaler from Sam's back pocket. He tossed it too his soon who used it greedily, as if he was dying of thirst. He laid there, trying to regulate his breathing again.

Sam said nothing, as he resumed regular breathing and for a moment neither did John.

"Don't disobeye me again," John finally warned and silently Sam nodded. He hung his head in helpless defeat, not that there had been much of a fight before hand. John shook his own head.

"disgusting," he muttered softly before walking out leaving Sam alone to drown in his own misery.

The next day John slipped on the ring. Sam didn't bother protesting or pleading, it was no use. And John warned him to keep up on his classes. He wouldn't want the teachers or Dean, when he got back, to notice weird changes like his straight A record vanishing.

The next few days was hell for him. As soon as he was taken back to the motel John raped him and forced him to give a blowjob on his own father. Half the time he threw up as soon as John left the room. He wasn't sure how much longer he could bare it. At least John stopped with the beatings, not wanting to damage Sam's face too much and letting the bruises heal before Dean returned. He was a smart one, that John.

Sam jumped one night when he heard the door opening. He tensed, thinking it was going to be John wanting one in the middle of the night like he sometimes does. He blinked as the light was turned on and he stared at Dean standing in the room. His whole body relaxed and it seemed like he could finally breathe again, he was no longer alone.

"Dean," he whispered and Dean grinned.

"You seem surprised to see me, squirt."

"I didn't...expect to see you too soon."

Dean rolled his eyes.

"The poltergiest was easy, dad could have done it by himself." He studied Sam's face. "Everything okay?"

Sam nodded, thankful his bruises were fading.

"Yeah," he said. "It is." And he fel tlike he was telling the truth. Now that Dean had returned things were definantly looking up.

"I'll go knock on dad's door," Dean told him. "And let him know I've come home."

Sam nodded, wondering that now that Dean was there would John somehow still make him wear those horrible cock rings? His penis was now officailly swollen and bruised, he wasn't sure how much more of it he could take. He could hear his father talking to Dean, with how thin the walls were. It wasn't hard to hear the surprise in his voice.

He waited for Dean to come back in the room.

"He said I could do another hunt by myself soon," he told Sam happily. "Since this one went so well."

Sam nodded, swallowing. He hated that John was using Dean's desire of approval and appreciation as a way to get rid of Dean so he could rape Sam. Wrong couldn't even begin to describe that.

"You okay, kiddo?" Concern flickered in Dean's eyes. "Everything went well when I was gone?"

"Yup." Sam forced himself to remain cheerful. "I'm glad you're back, Dean," he added sincerly. "Hasn't been the same without you."

"Damned straight." Dean gave him a grin. Sam wanted so desperatly to tell him everything but he couldn't. He just _couldn't. _

The next day when he woke he smiled as he saw Dean asleep across from him. It felt so good not to be alone anymore.

The door knocked and John entered. Dean jumped, blinking.

"'M awake," he muttered.

"No you're not," John chuckled. "Say Dean, would you mind taking the Impala and getting some breakfest from the nearest fast food place?"

Dean looked at him in surprise.

"You want me to drive the Impala?"

"I said so, didn't I?"

"You never let anyone drive that car."

"Well I'm letting you now, aren't I?" John dangled the keys in front of Dean. Dean grinned and took it. In a second he was vanished. John stared at Sam.

"That was almost too easy," he smirked and went over to his youngest who trembled, even know he knew what was going on.

"Is this..." Sam dared to speak but tham shut his mouth quickly as the cock ring was slid on him.

"Yes?" John stared at him. "You wanted to ask something?"

"Yes sir." Sam's voice was a whisper.

"Than ask."

"Is this going to be...everyday?"

John nodded.

"It is, as long as I can get Dean out of the room and you better pray I can get him to leave for the second time at night for me to take it off. If I don't, you'll have to suffer the conscequences."

Sam shuddered at the thought of wearing the ring all day and all night.

"And you better eat your food, even if you're not hungry. You won't want Dean to notice anything, now would we?"

"No sir."

Sam silently dressed, his whole body acking. Dean came back within ten minutes or so, grinning about the drive.

"How was she?" John smiled.

"Great!" Dean's response got a chuckle out of his father.

"I think you'll be able to drive her more often."

"Really?" Dean's eyes flashed hopefully. "You mean that?"

"I think you've earned it," John told him. "Maybe tonight you could drive her around the neighborhood or something while Sam's studying."

Dean's grin remained, thrilled for the appreciation his father was finally giving him-not knowing the real reason behind John's words.

"Now come on, we need to take Sammy to school."

Anger boiled inside of Sam. Dean could call him that, but his father? After what he's done to him?" But silently and sullenly he followed, trying to mask his true feelings from Dean. Dean could never know the truth. If he did than he might leave Sam and than Sam would truly be alone, forever...

**Sorry for such a depressing ending to a chapter lol. But I'm thrilled that people are liking the story despite the dark tones :) **


	7. Chapter 7

**Thanks for all the great reviews!**

Sam climbed into the backseat and tried not to squirm. Dean was too busy talking to his father, retelling his first hunt by himself, to really see the suffering on Sam's face. Not that Sam could blame him. He could see how desperate Dean was to really connect with John. He didn't know the kind of monster their father really was, how could he?

Sam swallowed, forcing himself to keep his emotions from spilling out. From confessing everything to Dean. Finally they were at the school. Dean turned to grin at him, but the grin faded.

"You okay Sammy?"

John turned sharply, hidden warning in his eyes.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Why?" Sam forced a smile on him and an innocent look in his eyes.

Dean shrugged.

"You look kind of pale, you feeling all right?"

"Yup." Sam didn't hesitate to answer.

Dean frowned.

"I'm sure the boy's fine, Dean," John told him.

Dean shrugged.

"Okay, see you after school, Sammy."

"See ya." Sam was anxious to leave before he gave anything away.

That day was hell for him like always. He sat in the back where less attention was drawn from him, so he was able to squirm while not getting noticed. The squirming helped sometimes, but also made it worse.

But he couldn't sit still. He could already go to the bathroom too, it hurt like hell to try and pee with that thing on him. But sometimes he felt like he would burst if he didn't. He was too terrified of taking it off just for that, even for a second. John would find out. Somehow he would know.

He had thought Dean coming back would have made things easier, in a way it made them worse. Hiding it from him was such an exhausting job. He had forgotten how exhausting it was.

School couldn't end fast enough. Both John and Dean were with him in the car and they drove back to the motel. Sam felt a sinking feeling that John wouldn't be able to get Dean away. He was right. Dean wanted to spend time with them, to make up with being gone. He was worried about Sam. He could sense something was wrong, but he just wasn't sure what.

Dean suggested they eat out for the night. When John walked by Sam he leaned into his ear.

"Don't you dare take it off tonight, leave it on. I'll come in and check tomorrow to make sure it's still on."

Sam stared at him in horror.

"You won't take it off tomorrow?" He managed to whisper.

"You think this gets you out of wearing it everyday?" John's voice was a hiss. "You better pray I have better luck tomorrow night, Sammy. This'll also make up for me not being able to fuck you."

Sam swallowed and nodded, groaning inwardly at the thought of wearing that dreaded thing all night and all day next day. He wasn't sure if he could handle it. And yet, he was sure that he would. What choice did he have?

He barely ate his dinner. Dean definantly noticed something was wrong, but also realized that Sam didn't want to talk about it in front of John. He had a sickening feeling that it had to do with those kids. He kept on trying to tell himself that he gave Sam the knife. That Sammy would be able to defend himself, but deep down Dean knew better.

After dinner Sam went to the restroom. John had gone to his separate room. Dean laid on his bed and hummed a song mindlessly.

Sam tried very hard not to whimper as he went to the bathroom. He turned on the water of the shower than.

"Don't use up all the hot water!" He heard his brother shout.

"I won't!" He had to call back, or else Dean would sense something was wrong. The water felt good for him, but it was also torture in a way. As he stood there, his legs shaking, he finally couldn't stand it anymore. He sank to the floor and folded his knees, and started to sob.

After a few seconds Dean frowned at the strange noise he was hearing in the bathroom.

"Sammy?" He could hear the water running but there was something else too. Another sound. "Sammy?" He realized that Sam had forgotten to open the door. He pushed it open and opened the shower curtain and stared at Sam huddled in the corner, whimpering and rocking back and forth-the water beating down his back. Quickly Dean turned the water off.

"Sammy." He stared at the welts across Sam's chest and back. He stared at the cock ring. "What the fuck?" He knelt down to his brother. "What...why is there a goddamned cock ring on you, Sammy?" He reached over to take it off but Sam jerked backwards.

"Don't!" Sam shook his head. "Not allowed to take it off, not allowed."

"Who put it on you, Sammy?" Dean's voice was harsh. "WHO?"

Sam trembled at his tone but he couldn't answer.

"WHO? Was it those kids?"

Sam slowly nodded.

"Damn it, I'm gonna rip them apart, limb from limb." Dean's fists closed tightly.

"No," Sam pleaded. "Please don't."

"What about the knife?"

Sam swallowed and shook his head.

"Didn't help."

Dean closed his eyes.

"I have to tell dad..."

"NO!"

"I have to, Sam! I mean look at you! You need a hospital!"

"No! No Dad, no hospital, _please _Dean. Please!" Sam sounded terrified as he tried to keep his voice low, his entire body shaking. "Please, please, please..."

"Okay," Sighed Dean, giving in for now. "Okay Sammy, I won't say anything now."

"Ever, you won't say anything ever."

"Fine, ever," Dean said, gritting his teeth. "But I want you to try and be able to remember what those bastards look like so I can kick their asses."

Slowly Sam nodded.

Dean helped him to his feet and let him to the bed. He started to pull the cock ring off but Sam shook his head.

"Not allowed."

"No one is the boss of you, Sam. No one can make you wear it."

"Please, no." Sam's voice was begging so slowly Dean nodded.

"All right. I guess. I'll leave it on for now. I want to take care of those welts and bruises though. Some of them look pretty bad. Is this why you've been acting so different lately?"

Quickly Sam nodded. That was easier than the truth.

"How bad was it? Was it more than once when I was away?"

Sam nodded again, this time slowly.

Dean cursed softly.

"Damn it Sam, dad should know..." He felt Sam's shoulders tensing at that. "All right,all right, we won't tell him. Not now at least."

Relief flooded with Sam, for not having to hide the ring or the bruises and welts. Dean got the cloth once more and the medical bag from the table and did his best to help heal Sam's wounds, his physical ones at least. Who knows how long he'd recover from his emotional wounds....if ever...

**I hope you still like it! Please review!**

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	8. Chapter 8

**Okay I may not be able to do as many updates every day, but I will try to do at least one, if not two. For some reason I'm really eager to write this story lol...

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Dean watched his brother fall asleep. He was still shaking like anger. He stared at the ring, heat rising in him. He couldn't stand it anymore. He couldn't stand seeing that dreaded thing on his baby brother, bruising Sam's penis the way it was. He slowly and carefully started to remove it. In an instant Sam's eyes snapped open and pushed Dean's hand away angrily and fearfully.

"No! Leave it on," he begged in a whisper. "Please."

"I can't...I can't see you like this, Sammy, in pain. You have to let me take it off." Dean's voice was pleading. "For me, please."

"No." Sam gritted his teeth. "No." He looked at Dean, tears in his eyes. "Please, no. It'll just make it worse."

"I wish you'd tell me more, who these kids are," Dean sighed as he ran his hand through Sam's hair. "What they look like, where and when they are doing this." He felt Sam's entire body stiffen as he continued to talk and slowly nodded. "All right, for now I won't push it."

Sam nodded as he pulled his blanekt up.

"I'm sorry this is hurting you," he whispered and tears filled Dean's eyes.

"If anyone should be sorry, it should be me. For letting something like this happen to you." He shook his head. "I just...I don't think I can keep silent much longer aboutt his, Sammy."

"You can't tell dad."

"If it happens again, I'm going to have to. And with you wearing that ring it looks like will happen again."

"No, Dean, please, they...they said they'd stop if I obeyed them. If I played their games for a while, they'd leave me alone. Soon they'll leave me alone."

Dean stared at him.

"You really think I'm going to believe that?"

"It's the truth," Sam whispered. "They just want someone to play with, to mess around with for a while. Than they'll..."

"Choose someone else?"

Sam hung his head and nodded.

"Please, just let me deal with it," he begged. 'You'll just make it worse/"

Dean swallowed.

"I'm not promising anything," he said. "But I'll try."

"And whatever happens, don't tell dad. He couldn't handle news like that." Sam was really lying now, but desperate to keep Dean off of his back.

"Again, I can't promise anything, but I'll try."

That was the best Sam could get out of him, so he took it. Dean watched his brother fall back to sleep finally and stared at the ring. It took all of his will power not to take it off.

The next morning John knocked at the door around 6 am, jolting them both away.

"Say, Dean, why don't you get us breakfest again?" John suggested suddenly. Dean was relunctant to say yes at first, while glancing at Sam. But he did so, not to cause John to suspect anything.

"It took you what, almost 45 minutes with the traffic last time?" John added. "And with the line?"

Dean frowned.

"Yeah, why?"

John shrugged.

"Just curious." He smiled at Sam who said nothing.

"You going to be okay?" Dean glanced at Sam who quickly nodded.

"Fine, I'll be fine."

Dean frowned again, still not liking the idea of leaving his brother alone, and nodded. He could only imagine how uncomfortable Sam must be feeling at the moment. It nearly destroyed his appetite, but if he didn't eat John would definantly know something was up.

So he left. John locked the door instantly and closed the shades.

"Kneel," he said with a snap of his finger. Sam qucikly obeyed as John took off Sam's boxers and shirt. "We don't have a lot of time," John added, a little breathlessly. He nodded in approval. "Good, good boy; it's still on." He petted Sam's hair, like he would with a dog. Sam felt sick at the way his father was treating him. "Lay on the bed, turn over," John told him. "We don't want to a fight right now. We don't want Dean walking in when we're doing it, now do we?"

Sam swallowed and nodded, but than quickly shook his head.

"No sir," he agreed quickly.

"Good," John grunted. He slid inside of Sam almost easily now. Sam hoped that he would be kind enough to take the ring off but John didn't consider it. Sam let tears form in his eyes and grabbed the blankets but he wouldn't let John see any other kind of pain.

"Oh fuck, Sammy, I hate it when I can't get near you," breathed John. "To feel your tight ass like this..."

Sam closed his eyes, trying to drown out the words. How wrong they sounded. He hated the fact that John called him Sammy.

John suddenly snapped his finger and ordered Sam to kneel once more. Quickly he shoved his penis inside Sam's mouth. Sam knew there wasn't enough time to protest and so he took it, trying not to vomit. He just wanted it over. Soon John came and without complaining or protesting Sam swallowed it.

"You've been such a good boy," John whispered as he dressed. Sam still knelt there. "You'll have to have some sort of reward soon. I have half the mind to take that ring off of you right now."

Sam looked at him pleadingly.

"No, you're not that lucky." John chuckled. "Don't worry, you'll get your reward For being so good, for not fighting." He kissed Sam on the lips. "For not telling Dean."

Sam tensed at that.

"It's been so hard, I know," John added. "But I'm proud of you, Sam, for doing it for me."

Sam felt sick at this. How could his father say those things and mean them? How could this beast b_e _his father?"

They heard the Impala and John snapped to atttention.

"Get dressed," he quickly barked, panic in his voice. Sam obeyed quickly. "Act natural," John added in a growl. He unlocked the door.

"Sorry it took so long," Dean said as he came in a few seconds later. "Long line."

"No need to apologize," John assured him. Dean eyed his brother.

"You okay?" He asked. During the drive over he had been battling on whether or not to tell John.

"Yeah," Sam quickly assured him. He grabbed the breakfast burger quickly, determined to fake it for the both of them. They all ate silently and John said it was time to go to school.

Sam got used to not fidgeting so much. He was still the entire way to school. Dean kept looking at him but Sam's eyes warned him not to say anything. He gave Dean one last pleading look before leaving. _Please, don't tell. Don't say anything._

Dean took the hint and decided that for today, he'd keep silent.

* * *

Finally school was out. Sam was used to his penis aching and hurting like hell by the time the end of the day came. He was getting better at paying attention too. Soon he wondered if it would be second nature to him, this cock ring on him. Would he feel weird without it?

He got home, praying that John would remove it. It's been two days, two days of hell. Two days and one night. He just had to, didn't he? John asked if Dean could swing by at Bobby's and pick up some things for their next hunt. Dean wanted to ask Sam, in privet, if the kids hurt him but relunctantly decided to go. He hated leaving Sam, now that he knew what was going on. But there was something about that story that didn't feel right to Dean. Something about this entire thing just wasn't right.

Again John closed the door and locked it and closed the shades.

"Time for your reward," he said, while smiling. Sam was already kneeling without being told. John took of fhis jeans and slipped off the cock ring. Sam gasped at the sensation and sighed in relief.

"Thank you sir," he said, tears rolling down on his cheeks. Tears of relief. "Thank you."

"Yes, of course," John said. "You're cock looks like it could use some relief," he added while smiling and Sam looked confused. John started to pump it and Sam jerked away. This wasn't right. His penis couldn't get hard, not when John, his _father_, was doing it to him.

"Please, dad," he begged.

"Don't fight it, I'm giving you a damned reward, you should be thanking me!" John shouted and continued to pump it quicker and harder. It was at the edge of the climax when John decided to take it in his own mouth and suck on it. Sam squirmed, twisted away, and tried to fight the feeling off. This was wrong. His father was doing this to him. This wasn't right, this was sick.

But that didn't stop him from coming in John's mouth. John didn't swallow it, though, He spit it out onto Sam's chest.

"Clean yourself up," he said in a slightly disgusted voice. Sam obeyed. "Now it's your turn to please me," John added. It was Sam's turn to take his penis. Even though he had already done so that day John was taking all the chances he could get. Both knew it was getting harder and harder for Dean to leave.

Finally John was finished raping him and he was allowed to dress himself. The cock ring wasn't on him anymore. He decided to take a shower. The one night before didn't really count to him. When he was in there he heard the door knocking.

"It's me, Dean, I'm back. Can I come in?"

Sam hesitated and nodded.

Dean opened the curtain as Sam turned off the water.

"No ring," Dean said in an approving tone.

"I know, they took it off."

"Does that mean they're done with you?"

Sam nodded.

"I still think-"

"Don't, Dean, just let it go."

"Damn it, Sam, are you sure you don't know who they are?"

"No, I think they go to the college, they always had masks on."

"Smart thing for them to do," Dean muttered with dissapointed in his voice.

"Dean, please, let it go."

"How can I?" Dean sounded helpless. "You're my brother, and those bastards-"

"I know, just don't tell dad. That'll make it worse. It's over now. Just let it go."

"All right," Dean sighed. "All right, for now I'll let it go."

"Thank you." Sam breathed a sigh of relief and Dean slowly decided to leave. Sam turned on the water and closed his eyes, his whole body relaxing. Now he and John could go back to pretending and he'd wear the ring in secret. He'd be more careful with showing his pain in the future. Dean would never know again. And just like all those years before this John would continue to rape him and both would pretend nothing happened at all. Dean will never know the truth. Sam'll make sure of that.

**I know the whole, Dean not doing anything about the kids or not suspecting John or not telling John is a stretch but I'm trying to make it work here lol. I'm hoping it's somewhat decent. And yes, the Sam torture will end soon and John'll get what he desreves.**


	9. Chapter 9

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Thanks for all the great reviews! And don't worry, I haven't forgotten my other stories it's just I'm really into this one for some reason and I want to try and finish it, lol.

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The next weeks was the same horrible routine for Sam. Much to Sam's relief Dean stopped worrying and pressing the issue so much. He was able to pretend once more. He made an even bigger effort to act natural around Dean. He saw Dean was begining to relax somewhat. John got into the routine of asking Dean to get breakfast for them. Than he would quickly slip on the cock ring. More than once John was unable to get Sam alone at night so more than half the time Sam would have to spend the night while wearing it. Once he had to wear it for five days straight. John refused to take it off in the mornings when he would rape him. Sam gritted his teeth and bore it, though, refusing to show any sign of pain when he went to the bathroom at night or took a shower. He couldn't let Dean see the ring again.

Even though in the past it was easier for John to get Sam alone in the other room Dean had become more and more watchful, more protective, since he learned the half truth about what had happened to Sam. Sam was tired of fighting John. Since he was a kid he had fought his father, or tried to. It was exhausting, though, and so much easier just to give up. The ring may have been the last breaking point, a way for him to think of himself as John's slave, to do whatever he told him to do. He knelt, now, without protesting. He was just wanting it to be over. When John did get him alone at night he would be raped twice in one day, than.

All of that was, fine, though, as long as Dean didn't know. They had already moved to a different town, different school. John decided that Dean should go on more hunts by himself. While Dean was thrilled and eager with this decision he didn't like the idea of leaving Sammy alone, with what happened last time.

"Those kids aren't here, though, Dean," Sam told him kindly when he mentioned it in their room.

"Yeah, I know," Dean sighed. "I still don't like leaving you alone."

"It's okay, Dean," Sam tried to assure him. It wasn't, but he couldn't let Dean know this. And Dean deserved more independence. Dean was so eager to go on hunts alone.

"I still don't like it," Dean muttered. He just couldn't shake the feeling off that something was wrong, dreadfully wrong.

John tried to hide his eagerness but Sam could see it when Dean was packing.

"It'll probably only be a couple of weeks," Dean decided.

"I trust you to get the job done," John told him. "I'll be working on my own gig, here," he added and Dean nodded.

_Yeah right _Sam snorted. But he said nothing. He tried to act chipper and carefree, for Dean's sake.

Dean gave once last glance at Sam before climbing into the car that Bobby was letting him borrow again.

"I'll be fine," Sam said with a laugh and gave him a wink. "Jerk."

Dean smiled at that.

"Bitch." Finally he convinced himself to drive off.

John and Sam watched again, this feeling seemed familiar to Sam.

"Get inside," John asid calmly. "I have a few surprises, for you."

Sam hid his groan.

"Now we don't have to pretend again," sighed John as he closed the door. Sam knelt like he was supposed to. He was John's slave, he was nothing. How many times had John told him that? He had fought it for so long, all these years, but finally it was sinking in. John slipped on what looked like a collar onto Sam's neck.

"You're my little pet," he sneered. "My bitch, and this shows it. While Dean's gone you won't be going to school. You'll serve me as my bitch."

Sam lowered his head in helpless defeat.

"Yes sir," he whispered and John struck him across the face.

"No speaking," he growled. "Pets have no voice, you well not speak again until I tell you to."

Sam said nothing, too terrified to move. He hated the collar. It was so belittling, more than that. It was crude. It nearly choked him, and on that awful thing was a leash which John was holding.

Was he really this dog like John thought he was? Did he do something to deserve this vile treatment?

He groaned at the thought of two weeks alone with this monster. This monster that was his master. He shook his head, no John wasn't his master...was he? He was so confused now, so alone. And now Dean was gone, yet again.

"Come." John tugged at the leash and he was forced to go towards the bed. Just please, let this nightmare end.

For the next week he didn't leave the motel room. His father couldn't get enough of him. He had no real thoughts now, he could only feel pain and the sense of helplessness and confusion. And lonliness. The collar seemed to choke at him constantly, making it even more difficult to think about anything else than what his father was doing to him. Than the slave he was becoming. The slave that he was. The "pet" that he was.

"Please, Dean, come back home," he thought, as he drifted off to sleep, his father's arms drooped over him. The collar and the ring both killing him. "Please Dean, save me. Please..."

* * *

Dean woke with a jolt.

"Sammy?" He swore he heard his brother pleading to him, asking for help. He glanced around the room. He was alone, on a hunt by himself. He couldn't shake off that feeling, though. That something was wrong. He remembered feeling like that on his first hunt and look what happened.

"Please, Dean, please." His brother's voice was soft and pleading. "Please, help me."

That's it. He couldn't ignore it any longer. If his brother was in pain, like before, if someone was hurting him. He shook his head. He had to go back home. He grabbed his bag and went to his car, even though it was only 3:00 in the morning. He had to go back home.

* * *

"You want it, you little bitch," John grabbed as he raped Sam roughtly. Sam couldn't help but sob onto the pillow. "You want it," he continued angrily. "Don't give me that crap, you know you want it. Say it!"

"I...want....it..." Gasped Sam. For some reason for the last few days John was getting angrier when he raped Sam, rougher. It became more and more painful.

"Please, give it to me," John growled.

"Please give it to me," Sam sobbed.

"That's what I thought, you're just a little bitch, a little fucking whore aren't you?" John was muttering, going faster and faster.

"Please, dad!" Sam started to beg, it was hurting-really hurting. John hit him hard on the backside.

"What did I say about speaking?" He tugged at the leash, reminding Sam of it, as if Sam could forget.

"I'm sorry," gasped Sam. "Sorry."

"Not yet, but you will be," John snarled. Sam buried his head, praying it was going to be over. But John seemed to be really going at it. They didn't notice the figure coming at the door.

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Dean heard noises in the motel room. It sounded like Sam sobbing, John yelling. Was a fight going on? Quickly he pushed the door open and stared in horror, all air escaping from him, as he saw the image in front of him. His father on top of his brother, raping him, while Sam was desperatly calling out for help...

**Yes, I was super, super mean to Sam in this chapter but it finally got a happy ending in a way! Dean found out finally! :)**


	10. Chapter 10

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Thank for all the reviews!

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Dean just stood there, staring, usnure of what to think or feel or how to act. He was in shock. His breathing got sharper as he stared at the image, the puzzles piecing together. This explained so much. Sam's fear of telling his father, of wearing the cock ring and not taking it off, of John eagerly sending him on trips by himself. And always trying to get him to leave. This explained everything. Color was filling his face again. He was able to think a bit. _His father was raping his baby brother_! His father didn't seem to notice Dean entering the room, but Sam dead. Dean saw his brother turn his head and stare at Dean in utter horror.

With a sudden roar Dean lunged for his father, anger and shock mixing in as one.

"You fucking bastard, you _sonofabitch_!" He bellowed at the top of his lungs. John yelled in surprise as he was thrown to the floor and Dean grabbed the rifle that was next to the door. Without hesitating he began to hit John over and over with it. "All this time," Dean snarled. "All this goddamned time-"

"Dean, please!" John cried out desperatly, trying to escape the blows.

"That's why you wanted me to go on these hunts, wasn't it?!" Dean bellowed, the hitting not stopping. Sam sat there, too peterified to move. "It's not because I'm old enough, but you wanted me away so you can fuck my brother. So you can fuck your SON, you piece of shit!" Dean was really screaming now. Sam jumped as he heard knocking on the door. He wasn't surprised people were getting worried, Dean was making a lot of racket. The door was so old it always had a hard time opening and closing so the baging continued.

"What the hell is going on in there?" It was the motel manager. Dean ignored him as he continued to hit John over and over, rage filling him. The overcosuming shock of what his father really was eating away at him. Tansforming him into something else. "I'm calling the police!" The manager threatened and Sam heard him walk away.

"Dean, please," he begged. "Please Dean."

But Dean was ignoring everyone expect the monster that was his father in front of him. John was hardly awake, his nose was covered in blood and so was his mouth and his eyes were black and blue.

"Dean," John tried again. "Dean, please."

"This...is...for....Sam," Dean managed to snarl. "For everytime he couldn't defend himself you sick fuck. You goddamned bastard, he's your _son_, how could you do this to him? To US? You little-"

"Dean, please!" Sam jumped up and tugged at his brother. "Please, Dean. You're killing him!"

"That's the idea," Dean growled.

Suddenly the door was banged on again.

"Open up, police!" Dean was too focused on his father to pay attention to much else. The door was kicked open.

"Hands in the air, drop the weapon now!"

Dean did so instantly.

"Please, let me explain," he stared at say and the police stared at John on the floor and Sam standing, stark naked with a collar on his neck.

"Please, do, I'd like to know what the HELL is going on!" The police's voice was sharp and loud.

"He...he was raping my brother." Dean's voice shook. The policeman looked at Sam sharply.

When his eyes were taken away from Dean and John, John took that advantage to attempt and flee. He rose and without thinking Sam managed to grab the knife from under his pillow. Quickly and swiftly he stabbed John in the back as John started to lung at one of the officers violently. John yelled and collapsed by Sam still kept on stabbing, tears rolling in his eyes. Dean's own eyes widened in horror and shock and quickly grabbed Sam and pulled him away from the dead body of his father. Sam started to struggling and sob, fighting Dean with every strength he had.

"He's dead, Sammy, he's dead!" Dean said, holding him firmly. "He's dead, it's over. It's over Sammy. The nightmare is over." Slowly Sam's body began to relax and he fell limp into his brother's arm, still sobbing and Dean held him gently, while rocking him back and forth and stared at the body of his dead father that was before him...

**TBC **


	11. Chapter 11

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Thanks for the reviews! Sorry it was a couple of days before I could update, lol. And no I still haven't forgotten my other stories :)

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Sam was still shaking as Dean held him and glanced at their dead father. The police were stunned. They weren't sure what the hell just happened. The officer that was closest to them looked at Dean sharply.

"You say he was raping your brother?" Dean nodded, his grip on Sam becoming tighter. "I walked in and he was..."Dean swallowed. "He had Sammy..."He couldn't finish the sentence and the officer nodded. "It's all right, son. I believe you." How could he not with the young boy standing completely naked with a damned collar on his neck? The officer reached for the collar to take it off, he couldn't stand to look at it, it made him sick. As well as the welts and bruises on Sam's back. Sam jarked at the touch, and started to sob.

"Don't," Dean said softly and the officer looked apologetic.

"I was only trying to-"

"I know, I know what you were doing. Let me." Carefully Dean unlatched the collar and took it off on Sam's neck. Angrily he tossed it to a corner. Sam shuddered as he did so, shock consuming his body. Quickly the policeman collected himself.

"We need to take your brother to a hospital," he told Dean and reached for a blanket that was on the bed. As he reached out to wrap Sam's naked body with it Sam jumped.

"It's okay, Sammy." Dean kept his voice soft when he was speaking. He gratefully took the blanket from the officer and wrapped it around his brother. "Thank you," he said quietly and the officer nodded.

"It's clear he won't let anyone else touch him, but we do need to get him to the hospital. Can you lead him outside?"

Dean nodded.

"Good. I'd call an ambulance but I think that would create more problems than actual help."

"No ambulance," Dean quickly agreed. "The hospital's going to be bad enough for him." Dean made sure the blanket was wrapped tight around his body. "Come on, Sam," he said gently. "We're going outside."

Sam obediently followed Dean. The shock of Dean finding out, of Dean beating their father, of him stabbing him and thus killing him, still filled him. He couldn't think straight. He could barely understand what was happening. All he knew was he didn't like to be touched. The only person that didn't make him shake and sob in fear from their touches was his brother.

Dean still made him feel safe, despite everything that had happened. There were two police cars that were outside. The group of officers followed them out of the room. One of them mentioned bringing a corener down to take care of John's body. Dean flinched a bit, when he said that. Saying it outloud made it all seem more real. They're father really was dead. And that was probably a great thing, considering the fact that he raped Sammy. But still, this was all happening _so fast. _He was barely adjusting to the fact that their father raped his brother. And now he was trying to deal with his father being dead and Sam being in a state of shock.

He swallowed. He had to be strong, for Sam. Their mother would have wanted him to be strong. Sam needed him now more than ever. They only had each other now. Dean would be damned if he let the law somehow break them up. Slowly he led his brother to the backseat of the car.

* * *

The rest of the day would also seem like a crazed blur. People running about in the hospital, docters trying to look at Sam while ask questions. Sam fighting them so much he had to be sedated.

"Really, it's the best thing for him right now," one of the docters told him kindly. "He needs to be checked but right now..."He trailed off and Dean understood and slowly nodded.

"What...needs to be done?" Dean asked quietly, his voice filled with fear and uncertainty.

"We need to stich up the area around his anus," the docter told him professionally. "To stop the bleeding that's there. His testicles and penis is very swollwen and bruised so we need to keep ice on it and to keep them elevated."

Dean numbly nodded.

"All right."

"Son, do you have someone we could call?" The officer who had tried to take the collar off and give the blanket to Sam asked. Dean nodded.

"His name is Singer. Bobby Singer. Family friend." He cursed himself, realizing he should have said Uncle, but now it was too late.

The officer nodded and asked for his number. In a trance like state Dean told him it. He closed his eyes remembering his foolish pride swelling up in him when John had let him go on those two hunts alone. And how scared Sam was of telling John, of course now it was so _obvious._

He sat there in the hallway, unsure of what to do or think. So many mixed emotions smothered him. The officer returned and said that it would be a few days but Bobby was going to be there was fast as he could.

"Good," murmured Dean. "Good." His eyes were casted on the floor, the image of his father on top of his baby brother still burned into his mind.

"Son, are you all right?" The officer asked, concern flickering in his eyes.

"Don't call me son." Was the only reply he got. He looked. "I didn't mean to-"

"I know," Dean sighed. "I know, I'm sorry. I just don't know..."His voice trailed off in a quiver. The docter came back over.

"You can see him now," he said with a smile. Dean jumped up eagerly, brightness finally filling his eyes. Timidly, as if he was afraid of what he'd find, he walked into his brother's room. He swallowed as he saw the sleeping Sam laying there-his face still looking innocent-covered in bandages and wires. But he was safe and alive. That was what was important. Slowly Dean sat on the chair next to Sam and took his brother's hand, even though it was covered in tape from the wires, and squeezed it. Finally he placed the hand to his face and kissed it.

"I'm so sorry, Sammy," he whispered, his body shaking at the site of his broken and damaged brother. "I'm so sorry, for not noticing. For not protecting you. So sorry, for everything/" And he laid his head next to Sam's legs and soon the room was filled with his anguished sobs...


	12. Chapter 12

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Thanks for all the reviews :)

Oh and I've updated Captive, for anyone that's interetesed :)

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Dean wouldn't move from the side of the bed. Slowly Sam's eyes fluttered open and he looked around the room.

"D...Dean?" He looked confused and Dean looked at him sharply.

"Sammy? You awake?"

"Wh...what happened? Where am I?"

"You're...you're at the hospital Sammy." Dean tried to make his voice remain calm, for Sam's sake.

"Wh...what happened?" Sam repeated himself, looking honestly confused.

"You don't remember?" Dean looked surprised.

"Not really...everything's a blur..."

Dean closed his eyes.

"I...will I came home from the hunt yesterday to find dad..."He couldn't even get the setence out.

It was Sam's turn to close his eyes. He nodded.

"You...you don't have to continue...I'm, I'm remembering." He swallowed as he thought about stabbing their father in the back. "Da..dad's dead isn't he?"

Dean slowly nodded, tears in his eyes.

"I...I killed him." Fear was in Sam's voice and eyes. Fear that Dena would hate him for what he had done. Dean gave a short laugh.

"I think I helped, Sammy. It wasn't just you. It wasn't your fault. He was trying to escape-"

"And I stabbed him in the back," Sam continued. "Over and over...I killed him." He stared at Dean. "You hate me now, don't you?"

Dean's eyes widened in shock.

"What? Sammy how could you even _think _that?"

Sam stared at him.

"For killing dad, of course. He's dead because of me."

"Don't sell yourself short," Dean said quietly. "If you hadn't killed him, I probably would have. For what he did to you." He closed his hand Sam's hand. "Sammy, why didn't you _tell _me? When you made you wear that thing that night, when you lied about the kids..."

"I didn't want you to know," Sam whispered. "I didn't want you to know and think I was disgusting. And you were so happy that dad was letting you do things on your own."

Dean closed his eyes.

"I wouldn't have thought you were disgusting, Sammy. I still don't. What dad did was _wrong_. It wasn't your fault. You didn't do anything wrong, understand?"

Sam slowly nodded.

"No, seriously, do you understand me?" Dean's voice was harsh. "I need you to understand this, Sam. And to believe me when I say that you _did nothing wrong_. Can you repeat that for me?"

Sam hesitated and swallowed, but than slowly nodded. He could do it for Dean, even if he didn't believe it.

"I did..."Dean nodded in approval. "Nothing wrong." He shuddered at the last sentence and Dean smile grew.

"Thank you Sammy, you've made me very happy hearing you say that." _Now if only he'll believe it _Dean thought sadly. The doctor than came in the room and smiled.

"Good, you're awake," he said. "How are you feeling?"

"Good." Sam managed to answer.

"Any pains anywhere?" The doctor asked and Sam shook his head.

"No." His voice was soft and the doctor nodded again and glanced at Dean.

"Someone outside is waiting for you, a family friend I believe. Said his name was-"

"Bobby?" Dean asked hopefully and sharply and the doctor looked surprised.

"Yes...Bobby Singer."

Dean quickly got up and glanced at Sam.

"I'll only be gone for a little while," he promised his brother who slowly nodded.

_"He's not really leaving" _Sam whispered to himself. _"He'll be back, he won't leave me."_

Dean reached the hallway where instantly he was grabbed into a hug by Bobby.

"I...I heard what happened," Bobby gasped, tears in his eyes. "I, I don't know what to say boy. I honestly don't."

Dean let himself be hugged, but he didn't return it.

"Did dad...John, give any indication that he was doing something like this?" He had to ask and it killed Bobby to hear Dean call him John instead of 'dad' now. Not that John deserved to be called dad anymore, but still...

"No, never." Bobby shook his head. "I still can't believe it." He swallowed. "Is Sam all right? I mean, I know he's not but..."

Dean knew what he was asking.

"He's doing better," he said slowly and Bobby nodded.

"Good." He looked at the doctor and the social worker that was standing there. "When would I be able to take them home?"

The two exchanged looks.

"See, sir, this is where it becomes tricky," said the social worker calmly.

"Really?" Bobby raised his eyebrows. "I thought this whole sitation was tricky."

"Yes well, you see you're not related to the Winchesters."

"I'm the closest thing they have to family," Bobby growled.

"I understand that, sir, but legally,"

"Would I be able to take care of him by myself?" Dean pleaded, stopping the worker in mid setence.

"What?" She honestly looked surprised.

"I'm old enough, right? I just turned 21, Sammy's 16 and a half years old. I'm old enough to take care of him. I'm an adult, afterall."

"True..."The worker frowned. "Legally there's no law preventing me from saying you can't take care of him, if you have some place suitable for him; but you don't-"

"We'll move in with Bobby," Dean quickly inturrupted. "He won't take care of Sam, I will. But we'll be living at his place. He has a house."

The worker frowned and looked at Bobby who shrugged.

"It's true." Was all he could think of saying.

The worker sighed and glanced at the doctor before finally saying.

"Right now the important thing is taking care of Sam, and making sure he gets better. When he's ready to leave we'll bring this up again, Dean."

Dean opened his mouth but Bobby placed his hand on the young man's shoulder and silently shook his head. Dean bit his lip from arguing, from yelling at the worker that they wouldn't break up this family. No matter how hard they tried, Dean wouldn't let them. He'd be damned if they split him and Sam up.

"Can I see him?" Bobby asked the doctor who nodded.

"Just don't make it long," he said. "The kid still needs his rest."

Bobby nodded, grateful just to have a chance at seeing Sam, but terrified at what he'd see. Dean knocked on the room first. Sam's face lit up in relief when he saw that Dean had indeed returned.

"Hey Sammy?" He came into the room. "Bobby's here."

His brother slowly sat up, trying to look as cheerful as possible.

"Sam?" Bobby entered the room slowly and stared at Sam in slight horror, hating seeing the kid so weak and hooked to machines.

"Hey Bobby." Sam managed to smile and Bobby reached over to hug the boy.

"I'm so sorry," Bobby whispered into his ear. "I didn't know, if I had _any _idea whatsoever, Sam you've got to believe me-"

"I do," Sam assured him quickly. "It's okay Bobby, I don't blame you."

_You shouldn't blame yourself _thought Dean, but kept that thought to himself.

"It looks like I'll probably be able to take care of you," he instead said, surprising not only him but Bobby for bringing that up. "If so, we'll probably live at Bobby's place. Does that sound good?"

Sam stared at Dean.

"You mean they're letting you take care of me? And not go into some foster family or something?" He sounded shocked.

"Nothing's set in stone." Dean shrugged. "But I don't see how they can stop me, I'm old enough after all."

Bobby bit his lip, trying to keep back from scolding Dean for telling too much. For giving hope with something they weren't sure was going to happen. For acting like it was going to happen. Instead he sat on a chair next to the bed and talked with Sam until the doctor told him visiting hours were over. The doctor looked at Dean who was still in the room. By than Sam was half asleep from exhaustion.

"Son, did you hear me? I said visiting hours were over,"

"Don't leave," Sam managed to whisper weakly and Dean nodded, reassuring him with his eyes.

"I heard you." Dean's voice was simple and direct. "I'm not leaving, though." His voice was firm, and it was clear that he meant it. Bobby glanced at the doctor and shook his head.

"I wouldn't press the sitaution if I were you," he warned him. "The kid's not about to leave his brother. The two are stuck together like glue."

The doctor slowly nodded.

"I'm begining to see that." He sighed and shrugged. "I don't see what it would hurt, hell it might even help the boy. Not that I have much of a say here, but I guess you can stay. As long as you keep quiet."

Dean nodded gratefully, the tension in his body slowly vanishing.

"Thanks," he said slowly. The doctor nodded.

"Just don't make me regret it," he said and quickly left. Bobby stared at Dean and at Sam, who was more than half asleep.

"I'll see both of you boys in the morning," he said cheerfully and Dean nodded.

"Thanks, Bobby," Sam managed to murmur sleepily and Dean quickly echoed his thanks.

"You're not leaving then? Sam asked, worry in his voice and Dean cupped his brother's hand.

"I'm not going anywhere," he promised. "No one can make me. I'm not gonna leave you, Sammy. No matter what happens."

"Good," Sam murmured. "Good." And with that Dean slowly began to hum a song and run his hands through his brother's hair as Sam managed to fell into a deep, and for once, peaceful sleep.

**TBC**


	13. Chapter 13

**Okay, I know I REALLY need to update my fics and finish most of them so yeah, this week I'm really going to try to force myself to do that, especially now I have the computer working again :)

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John's face inched closer and closer towards Sam who huddled in the corner.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry," he mumbled as he saw his father with blood stained dripping from his chest.

"No you're not," John growled. "Not yet, but you will be-you little slut!" He took off his belt.

"No, please, daddy," Sam sobbed, tears streaming down his face. "Please, no..."

Dean jolted awake as he heard sobbing and stiffened.

"Sammy?" He looked at his brother who was tossing and turning, obviously having a nightmares. "Sam!" He shook his little brother's shouldeers. Sam's eyes flew open and glanced around, trying to collect himself. "Wh...what's going on?" He managed to ask. Dean stared at him.

"You tell me," he said softly. "You were having a nightmare," he added and Sam swallowed as images of John flashed in his mind. Dean watched as his brother stiffened.

"Do you want to talk about it?" He asked softly. Sam quickly shook his head.

"No."

Dean nodded, even though it pained him that yet this was another thing he couldn't help Sammy with. Guilt still consumed him for what had happened.

"I'm sorry, Sammy," he said suddenly, unable to stand it any longer. Sam frowned.

"Sorry for what?" Honest confusion was etched on his face.

"For...for not seeing what was going on, for being so blind about it. For not helping you. I mean, when you were afraid to tell dad I should have known..." Dean shook his head, tears rolling down his face. Sam sat up.

"Hey," he said sharply. "It's not your fault. You couldn't have known."

"Yeah, but I should have known." Dean shook his head. "I feel like an idiot, being excited about hunting by myself. Thinking he trusted and respected me more when really he wanted me out of the house." Dean shook his head. "Sammy, I'm sorry. I was so blinded by wanting approval that I didn't see what was happening to you. What a bastard he really was."

"You couldn't have known," Sam repeated firmly. "It's not your fault."

Dean shook his head.

"Doesn't matter," he muttered. "I'm never gonna be able to forgive you. I mean, you're my brother. It's my job to protect you."

Sam swallowed.

"You're doing that now, though, right?" He asked logically and a quiver of a smile appeared on Dean's face.

"Yeah," he said softly. "Not gonna let anything bad happen to you again Sammy. I promise you that."

Sam nodded.

"I believe you." He looked around the pale hospital room. "When...when can we leave?"

Dean sighed.

"I don't know, " he answered honestly. "When the doctors think you're ready to leave."

"And...is Bobby going to take care of us?"

Dean sighed again.

"It's a little complicated Sam. Bobby's not related to us."

"So?"

"So it prevents him from taking us in, at least right away." Dean saw the fear in Sam's eyes.

"Don't worry, Sam," he assured him. "I won't let you go to a foster home. Remember. I turned 21 right? So far the social workers have been unable to come up with a reason why I can't take care of you. We'll even stay at Bobby's." He watched as Sam's face relaxed. "See? Promised I'm gonna take care of you."

Sam nodded.

"I can't...can't go to foster home," he managed to whisper, his voice quivering. "Can't...leave you..."

"Won't let them seperate us," Dean told him. "I promise. I'll kidnap you, even, if I have to."

That at least got a smile out of his brother's face. Dean studied him.

"Are you sure you don't want to talk about your nightmare?" He asked softly. Sam quickly shook his head. Dean nodded.

"All right..." He paused before continuing. "Look, I'm gonna see how Bobby's doing. He's out in the waiting room. He's not family, so he's even more restricted on visiting hours. Also want to talk to the social workers again."

Sam nodded, hating the idea of Dean leaving him, even for a little bit.

Dean saw the fear in his eyes.

"Don't worry," he assured his little brother. "I'll be back."

Sam nodded again, sighing in reassuring. As Dean left he closed his eyes. He quickly snapped them open when he saw the image of John staring at him.

The door opened and a male nurse came in with breakfast tray.

"Hungry?" He asked and Sam slowly shook his head.

"No...sorry."

"Oh come on," the nurse said softly as he set the tray on a nearby table and closed the door. Sam stiffened when it was locked. "It would hurt my feelings if you didn't at least try some of it." The nurse turned and stared at Sam. Sam's eyes widened in terror as the nurses's eyes changed to liquid black. "And you wouldn't want to do that, now would you?" The nurse asked, and smiled as he loomed closer and closer towards Sam....

**Sorry for not writing as much these past few weeks. I plan on chaining myself to the computer to get caught up on all my fics :)**


	14. Chapter 14

**I know that I've been AWFUL with updating my stories latetly, just AWFUL. I never attended to get this bad, but right now I have been swamped with schoolwork. I'm really really sorry it went on as long as it did,.**

**Sorry if the whole hospital stuff isn't entirely realistic, lol.

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Sam opened his mouth to let out a shout when the demon instantly covered it with his hand.

"Sh," he whispered. "We wouldn't want to be making any noise, now would we, Sam Winchester?" The demon smiled as he watched Sam's eyes widen.

"Yes," he breathed. "I know all about you, and your family. How your father killed my own son. I've been looking a long time to get my revenge on him. And I think this is only fair, don't you?" As he spoke Sam watched him take a knife from the uniform. "After all, he took my son. It's only fair I take his. An eye for an eye so to speak." He gave a soft chuckle as he heard Sam whimper while he pressed the knife to the skin.

"Hey!" They heard a voice at the door. It was Dean. Sam's eyes travelled towards that direction and he saw Dean struggling against the handle. Suddenly he kicked it open and without hesitation lunged at the demon. He jerked the knife out of the demon's hands. "Don't touch my brother, you sick sonofabitch!" he growled in that low and dangerous voice of his as he pressed the knife onto the the skin of the demon's host. The demon gave a dark laugh as his eyes changed black.

"You should know by now, Dean Winchester," he sneered. "That that weapon won't do anything to me." Dean stared at him, his own hands trembling with shock and anger.

"No, but this will," Bobby's voice came from behind as he took his flask of holy water and tossed it into the demon's face. The demon gave a yell and a hiss as he pushed Dean out of the way. Before they were able to do anything he climbed out the window.

Dean stood up, still shaking, and stared at Sam who laid there in obvious shock.

"Did he hurt you, Sammy?" He asked, trying to control the tremor in his voice. Sam quickly shook his head.

"N...no," he managed to reply. Dean nodded. By that time a doctor had rushed into the room.

"What the hell is going on?!" He demanded.

"A nurse tried to attack my brother, that's what," Dean snapped. "And escaped too."

The doctor stared at him in utter shock.

"I don't believe it." His voice was flat. "No one on my staff..."

"Yeah, think again," Dean growled. "You better believe it. In fact, tomorrow I want to talk to the secuirty about doing their jobs better!" His voice rose again, to that dangerous level that Sam wasn't used to hearing.

Sam was in shock. He was unsure of what just happened. He knew a demon had attacked him, for revenge, but it he still felt unclear about the entire situation. Maybe because it had happened so quickly. He had barely had time to breathe, let alone think about what was happening. One thing was clear, he still wasn't safe. Not even in the hospital. He watched Dean, who seemed to be studying the room.

"I'll be staying the night here," he added. "Same with Bobby." The doctor opened his mouth but than closed it. The look on Dean's face told him not to argue.

"Fine," he said quietly. "I'll contact the police."

"Don't bother," Dean snapped. "It's already too late, what are they going to do?"

The doctor opened his mouth and than closed it.

"Fine," he answered and glanced at Sam. "Did he hurt you?" He asked sincerly and Sam quickly shook his head. The doctor nodded.

"Good," he sighed. "I'll be back later tonight to check up on you." Sam nodded and so did Dean. Bobby placed his hand on Dean's shoulder.

"You should sit down, boy," he said quietly. "Before you burst."

Dean numbly obeyed. He continued to scan the room.

"What are you doing?" Sam managed to ask, as he cleared his throat. Dean looked at him.

"Thinking of a way how to get you the hell out of here."

Bobby glanced at him sharply.

"What?"

"I know he still needs healing, Bobby, but we can take care of him better than these assholes can. Don't you see? He's still in danger here! Demons know where we are now. We have to leave before he gets attacked again. What if I didn't come back in time? What if..."Dean swallowed. "We have to get him out of here," he added.

Sam pressed his lips tightly. He always hated it when Dean and John would used to talk about him while he was in the same room. But he knew Dean meant well. Still, he hated feeling so invisible during times like these. Even though it was him they were talking about.

Bobby stared at Dean.

"We'd be wanted for kidnapping by the police if we did that," he argued. Dean stared at him.

"So? Who gives a shit? Right now all I give a damn about is Sam. If he stays here he's going to be attacked again, it's only a matter of time!" Bobby sighed.

"Well we can't go out the regular way," he muttered and Dean smiled, knowing that was Bobby's way of saying that he was in. He stared at Sam.

"Are you up for this?"

"Yeah," Sam said quietly. "Looks like you're gonna do it, even if I'm not," he added, surprised at the sarcasim in his voice. Dean sighed.

"Sammy, I'm only doing this because-"

"I know why you're doing this," Sam said quietly. "The less time I have to spend in the hospital, the better." He swallowed. "I'm fine with...this...as long as...as long..."

"As long as what, Sammy?" Dean touched Sam's shoulder and Sam stiffened, but relaxed-telling himself it was Dean touching him. Nobody else.

"As long as you're not leaving me...I don't think I could handle that....right now."

Dean hugged Sam's hand than.

"I'm never leaving you," he promised. "No matter what. That's part of the reason I'm doing this. So they won't seperate us."

"If we're gonna do this, we better do this fast," Bobby reminded them.

Dean coughed.

"Right, Bobby, can you get your car and pull it in front of the window?"

Bobby stared at him.

"You're gonna escape through the window?"

Dean shrugged.

"The demon did it, why not us?"

Finally Bobby nodded.

"All right," he said quietly. He glanced at Sam. "You sure you're up for this, kiddo?"

"I'm sure," Sam said quietly. As Bobby left Dean quickly began to unplug Sam from the machines.

"You might have to help me-"Sam started to say sheepishly and Dean nodded calmly.

"Don't worry, I'll help you walk," he promised. "And climb out the window."

Sam nodded.

"Good." He pressed his rather shaky legs onto floor. In fact his whole body was shaking at what they were about to do. They were about to become fugitives. And it was because of him. Because Dean was trying to protect him. Danger seemed to follow him wherever he went. John's monsterous face flashed before him and he shut his eyes tightly. He couldn't afford to think about that now.

"Good thing we're on the first floor," Dean said, cracking a grin. Sam gave a fake attempt at a smile as the Dean pressed the window open. Thankfully it was low enough and there was no dresser there that he was litterally able to step over it, like the demon did. Quickly he helped Sam through the same process as Bobby opened the front and back door.

"Will ya hurry?" He growled from the dirvers seat. "We don't have all the time in the world!"

As fast as he could Dean helped Sam into the backseat and climbed into the front. "You okay?" He asked, as he turned around and Sam nodded, sitll shaking.

"Can we just get this over with?" He asked, his whole body trembling from what was happening and from what had happened.

"Took the words right out of my mouth," Bobby said and pressed on the gas pedal as Dean closed the door. As they sped along the highway Dean closed his eyes, his own heart pounding. He just made him and Bobby fugitives by escaping the hospital and stealing a patient. He just hoped that he was right about doing this, and that at the end it was worth it. That it would help Sam.

That's all that mattered, protecting Sam. The rest could all just go to hell....

**Not sure on this update, hope it's okay! :) And again, I'm REALLY sorry for letting this go on as long as it did! **


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